This Long-gun registry has saved countless lives and prevented the loss of billions of dollars in theft and property damage. Violent crime has completely stopped as have suicides, spousal abuse, child abuse, road rage, shoplifting, graffiti and jay-walking. All of these benefits are due to the excellent long-gun registry. It is a highly cost effective, accurate and secure system. Those evil western farmers, hunters and target shooting enthusiasts should just shut up and register each and every nasty firearm so we can live in peace and harmony, safe in the knowledge that the government is there to protect us from these gun-loving knuckle draggers.
Now please excuse me while I find a big red tent to hide under.
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